How I Feel About My Upcoming FET

It’s a weird thing to think about trying for a second baby when you’ve already had one as a result of doing IVF. On one hand, I’m no longer an IVF newbie. I know what to expect from it. I know what it takes. And I know that when it works it’s absolutely worth every penny, every tear, and every injection.

I also know that when it fails, it feels like your whole world is over.

Except this time around, as we are gearing up to try for baby #2, I no longer feel that pressure or the sense that I may never recover if it fails.

I am well aware that I’m one of lucky ones. We have multiple frozen embryos. The odds are in our favor. And I have a beautiful, healthy daughter, so even if I don’t get pregnant, I am beyond blessed. I would be sad, yes, but still immensely grateful that we were able to have a child at all.

Also, I feel like I’m just now getting back to being myself after having our daughter. I struggled with some mild postpartum depression, and our family has been through some major changes and transitions since she was born. My husband changed jobs twice (both were promotions, so it was a good change, but it still was stressful), we sold our house and are currently living with our in-laws until our new house is completed in October, I’ve struggled with balancing self-care and childcare, and we had to euthanize our beloved cat, Hemingway. Oh yeah, and we also endured an extremely stressful cross-country trip that involved everyone getting a stomach virus, missed flights, traffic tickets, torn ligaments, bladder infections, and puking on the airplane. (We keep telling ourselves it will make a hilarious family story in ten years).

So the thought of doing another IVF anytime soon just makes me want to say “No thanks!” But I’m 36 and I really don’t want to be 50 years old with children in elementary school, so we need to get moving. Honestly, if we didn’t have the frozen embryos, we probably wouldn’t be doing this again. I don’t want to take the drugs again. I don’t want to do the monitoring again.

On yeah, and I’m terrified to do it all again while caring for a toddler full-time.

But we are / I am doing it nonetheless.

All this to say that I’m feeling really neutral about it this time around. Almost ambivalent.

Again, I’m well aware that ambivalent is a very fortunate place to be. I remember the not-so-ambivalent feelings I had while trying to conceive my daughter. I know that so many of you reading this probably want to kick me right now. You’d give anything to do IVF without feeling pressure or without feeling like your world will fall apart if it fails. Oh, how I remember, dear friend.

I guess I’m just trying to say that I’m tired of infertility. I’m tired of it for all of us. For those of us trying to conceive baby #1, and for those of trying to conceive subsequent babies.

Thanks for reading this far! I that the Lord would comfort and sustain you wherever you are in your journey.

P.S. Some of you may remember a recent post where I talked about possibly doing a natural FET at Stanford.  Despite my numerous attempts to contact them, they never returned my calls.  Other clinics in the area offer natural cycles, but none that would do long-distance monitoring or would let me become a patient without re-doing certain tests.  So, we are staying with our previous RE (whom we adore, but he doesn’t do natural cycles).  His office is less than 15 minutes away and we feel we can be successful there again.


If you’re looking for more encouragement during infertility, be sure to check out my book, 31 Days of Prayer During Infertility.

Prayer and Community During Infertility {Free Facebook Group}

If you follow me on Facebook or Instagram, you may have seen recent announcement about the FREE Facebook group I’m hosting this coming month (July).  We’ll be going through my book, 31 Days of Prayer During Infertility.  The group will last from July 31-August 31.    Update: The group has since ended, but I’ll be planning new ones soon.  See the link (in red) at the bottom of this post to sign up to be notified when new groups start.

When I first created the group, my goal was to have at least ten women join.  Well, I’m super-excited that over 150 have joined so far!  We haven’t even officially started yet, but the women you have joined are already sharing their stories and praying and encouraging each other.  There’s also a giveaway going on right now, and I have a few more planned!

I know that not everyone participates in social media, so I wanted to be sure to invite blog readers, too.  It doesn’t matter if you’re trying to conceive your first or your fifth.  If you’re struggling to conceive, you are welcome in the group! You don’t have to purchase the book to participate, but if you do want to get a copy you can buy it here.

The group is ladies-only, but I know that several participants will also be going through the study at home with their hubbies.  It is a closed Facebook group, which means that only other members of the group will see your posts.  (However, anyone who looks at your profile may be able to see that you are a member of the group, so keep that in mind).  

Update: The group has now ended, but I plan on hosting another one soon.  If you’d like to receive an email when the next group starts, sign up here.  

Let me know if you have any questions!!

 

5 Popular Fertility Monitors: Which One is Right for You?

This post contains affiliate links.  You can see my full disclosure here.

fertility-monitor

I don’t know about you, but I’m so grateful that we live in a time when we have so much technology to help us in our fertility journey.

Think about it… we are the first generation whose family-building efforts have been assisted by apps, monitors, home test kits, and reliable medical information online.

Lately I’ve seen lot of ads and reviews for different fertility monitors.  I wondered if they’re really worth the extra money.  (After all, those trusty Wondfos and other basic ovulation test strips are pretty cheap). What makes them so special and what differentiates one from the other?

So I decided to do a comparison of five of the most popular fertility monitors and share them here with you.  I hope you find it helpful if you’re interested using one.

Ovusense Real Time Fertility Monitor

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This overnight monitor is worn internally (yes, up there).  It claims to provide a day’s notice of ovulation in real-time and a 4-day ovulation window with 99% accuracy.  It syncs with your iPhone or Android and is recommended for women with PCOS.  It requires a subscription (there are several different price points) and is approved for sale by the FDA*  in the United States.  If you want a detailed review, check out my friend Elisha’s hilarious (and informative) review.

Available for $99-$345 on Ovusense’s website.  Ovusense will extend a special discount to my readers.  Simply send an email to support@ovusense.com and mention Amateur Nester blog.  

OvaCue Mobile Fertility Monitor

 

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This monitor consists of an internal sensor (yup, another one you put up there) AND an oral/saliva sensor that you use each day, within the recommended 2-hour testing window.  It syncs up with an app you can use on your iOS device (or select Android devices) it and will store your cycle information for up to four months.  It does not require any subscription fees or test strips, so it saves you money in the long-run and it’s better for the environment.  It claims to predict ovulation up to 5-7 days in advance with 98% accuracy, and the manufacturers say it will work for women with irregular cycles and PCOS.  An added benefit is that OvaCue specialists at FairHaven Health are available to help you make sense of your results and charts.  How cool is that?!  If you want to see more pics, check out the brief review I did in 2015.

Check out the video below for more information on how OvaCue works.  You can also watch two video reviews (here and here).

Available for $279 on FairHaven Health.  Use coupon code amateurnester to receive 10% off your entire order.  Coupon code good through the end of 2017.  

ClearBlue Fertility Monitor

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Unlike the other two monitors I’ve mentioned so far, the ClearBlue Fertility Monitor is a stand-alone model; it doesn’t sync with a mobile device. And for those of you who were turned off the by internal sensors of the other monitors, you’ll be happy to know the ClearBlue Fertility Monitor doesn’t require you to insert anything into your body! It reads urine test sticks (purchased separately) and detects both the LH and estrogen (it’s the only non-invasive monitor that does this) to help determine your 6-day fertile window. The touch-screen monitor stores up to 6 months of information and is appropriate for women with cycles of 21-42 days. It claims to be 99% accurate in predicting the LH surge (which is an indicator of ovulation).

Monitor available on Amazon for $101.   Urine test sticks are $37.  

Ava Ovulation Tracking Bracelet 

fertility-monitors

The Ava is definitely unique in that it’s a bracelet!  If you’re someone who might have trouble remembering to test at a certain time and doesn’t want anything to do with pee sticks or internal sensors, the Ava might be an option for you.  You wear it at night and sync it with your iPhone or Android in the morning.  It claims to use your resting pulse rate, along with some other physiological indicators, to determine your 5-day fertile window with 89% accuracy.  This FDA-registered* device also tracks your sleep and stress levels.  The Ava is best for women with regular cycles between 24-35 days, and it has not been tested for women with PCOS.  Note: A close friend of mine ordered this and was so put-off by the long wait for it to be shipped that she eventually canceled the order.  Their own website says it takes 3-4 weeks to ship.

Bracelet available on AvaWomen for $199.  

KNOWHEN Advanced Ovulation Kit

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If the idea of spending over $100 on ovulation-tracking doesn’t sit well with you, the FDA-cleared* KNOWHEN Advanced Ovulation Kit might be a good “in-between” choice for you.  At a price range of $50-$75, it claims to pinpoint your 5-day fertile window with 98.9% accuracy.  It works by letting you look closer at a drop of saliva (almost like a microscope) first thing in the morning to determine your level of fertility.  It’s perfect for your inner science-geek!  No test strips or internal sensors required.

 

Available on KNOWHEN’s website for $49.99.  They’re also running a promo that gives you a $10 VISA Gift Card when you download and register and app that is included in the kit.  Use code AMN01.  There’s also a deluxe version available on Amazon for $75.  (Promo not available on Amazon).  

What do you think about these products?  Have you used any of these fertility monitors?  Please post your thoughts in the comments!

* Find out what FDA approved, approved for sale, and cleared means here.


If you’re looking for more encouragement during infertility, be sure to check out my book, 31 Days of Prayer During Infertility.