Audra’s Infertility & Ovarian Cancer Story

Each week I interview someone who has experienced infertility firsthand. Today I’m chatting with Audra.  She’s sharing her infertility and ovarian cancer story with us.  I hope you’re as inspired by her candidness and positive outlook as I was.

Q. Tell us a little about yourself.

So a little about myself …. I am a 10 year Ovarian Cancer survivor (diagnosed at age 21) and have been battling infertility since then. My husband and I have only been married for a year but have been friends for over 15 years. I was married and divorced twice before, not my proudest moments, but I have learned a lot from each of those relationships and have become a better person because of them. My personal struggle the last 10 years has been the hardest to overcome and until about a year and a half ago I felt like I didn’t know who I was or what I wanted out of life.

I am now happily married to my best friend (literally) and am blessed to be a stay-at-home wife, run a business and focus on my faith, my family and my health. I moved to Utah from Southern AZ (born and raised) last year and have enjoyed the experience and the ability to create a family with just me and my husband. I am also a Certified Medical Assistant and worked in Pediatrics in AZ. I do miss the field and being able to work with kids as it was almost a way for me to fill the void in my heart, but have not found that it is time for me to go back to work yet. I am thoroughly enjoying the chance to stay home and work on my health and fitness business. When the times comes I know that God will let me know.

I am a devoted Christian woman and found my faith after my last divorce. I love to sing and have since I was a little girl (pageants for 20 years) I recently starting singing for the worship team at our church and love that it gives me a completely different feeling of inspiration. I whole-heartedly strive to be a better person everyday and to allow God to pave my path and mend my heart. On my off time my husband and I enjoy trying out new things here in Utah and just being together. We are in the process of building our first home together and hoping to fill it with babies one day. My Goal in life is to be who God wanted me to be and share my journey with as many people as I can. I want to shine my light for the world to see 🙂

Q. How long have you been trying to conceive?

I have been somewhat trying to conceive since 2002, as my first husband and I got married in August of 2002. We wanted children right away but were also not in a huge hurry so we just let it be. When I found out I had Ovarian Cancer I originally went to the doctor because I thought I was possibly pregnant and had something wrong. 

Q. You were diagnosed with ovarian cancer at age 21 (which you beat- YAY!). Your doctors indicated to you then that you shouldn’t have issues conceiving. Do you know if your struggles are related to your cancer or are the causes unknown?

My reason for infertility is because of the fact that I only have one ovary and one fallopian tube which is blocked. At the time of my surgery for ovarian cancer the doctors told me that I should not have a hard time conceiving since I did still have a functioning ovary and tube, but with surgery and chemotherapy came infertility.

Q. Your husband is currently in Afghanistan. What’s it like going through the initial phases of IVF without him with you? Do you have any advice for other wives who are facing deployments and long separations during infertility?

My husband is actually home now (YAY). He is not in the military anymore but he is a contractor for the military, so he is gone a lot. The initial testing days (although I already knew the situation from previous tests) were hard to do with out my husband by my side. I wanted him there to experience as much as he could with me and in all honesty I was a little frustrated that he wasn’t able to. I don’t want to feel like this process is only something that I should struggle with and the fact that he wasn’t there made me upset. I know he would have been there if he could have been but none the less, it was hard. My advice to those that are going through deployments during this time in their life is COMMUNICATION ….. You have to let your spouse or significant other know what you are going through and how it makes you feel. I say this not to rub it in their face or do this in an unloving way but it is important (my opinion) to experience this together, the good and the bad. I have kept a journal of the process and it has helped me to vent or get out on paper what I need to say before I vomit it from my mouth to my husband. I know that this process is not easy for him either but we all know that it is a completely different burden for them.

Q. You’ve started a website to raise funds for your IVF. What kind of response have you received from your family and friends? 

The website was not an easy decision to make since it was opening the door to our life but I am glad that we did it. We have had a lot of family and friends support us along the way and although we are not at our goal financially we have had an abundance of love and prayers.

Q. How have you taken care of yourself mentally, emotionally, and physically during your struggles?

My focus the last year has been to take care of myself physically and emotionally. The first 8 years of this process I allowed infertility to defeat me and I decided, through my faith, that I would not allow that again. I have found that my trust in God and my spiritual connection to Him has been the ONLY way that I can take care of myself emotionally. I give it all to God and TRY to remain positive through His word. I also like to stay connected to other people that are going through Infertility and sharing my story has allowed me to stay sane and not feel alone. Physically, I have changed my lifestyle. I have chosen to take care of myself from the inside out and create and environment that a child will be happy and comfortable to grow in. My at-home business (health and fitness coaching) has allowed me to take charge of this a little better, fueling my body with healthy and natural foods. I also work out on a regular basis (at least 4 times a week) and keep myself in the best shape as possible without depriving my body and my spirit of a fun and healthy life.

Q. Have you been able to find a silver lining in your infertility?

I think there are a couple of silver linings in this struggle. One is that I have met some wonderful woman of God and have been able to connect with people on a very personal level. The other is that I have found God and connected with Him, which has allowed me to find myself. We will never understand the reason that we go through Infertility but one thing that I do know is that God had a reason that he chose me for this life. I have always felt like my life was meant for something wonderful and until the struggles in my life became the blessings that God gave me instead of the torture that I saw it as …. My life didn’t make sense. I was given this life for a reason and although I may not have a complete peace with it now, I am certain that God will get me through it and that His plan is better than mine.

Q. Anything else you’d like to share with my readers?

The only other thing that I would like to say is that I love you all …. I find a part of my heart that has room for every woman going through this. We are all connected in some way and my prayers are with each and every one of you. Don’t lose faith and remember that God will always give you the best life that you could have, you just have to trust in His plan and remain faithful. God Bless you ALL.

Thank you so much to Audra for sharing her story with us!  Please leave a comment below to let her know you appreciate her and consider pinning this image so others can find her story.  If you liked this interview, be sure to check out all my other interviews.  

 

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