Bethany’s Secondary Infertility Story

Each week I interview someone who has experienced infertility firsthand. A few months ago, I did my first interview with a “real-life” friend, Brandy. Today, I’m super-excited to be sharing an interview with another real-life friend, Bethany.

Bethany and I met in college in Southern California during my sophomore year when she was roommates with one of my good friends. We decided to room together our junior year, and we also lived together (with 3 other girls) our senior year. Due to distance, we haven’t seen each other in years, but I enjoy keeping in touch with her on Facebook. She was gracious enough to let me interview her about her struggles with secondary infertility, and I hope you enjoy getting to know her!

Bethany & I at a college formal in 2001

Q. Tell us a little about yourself.

My name is Bethany, and my husband and I live on a little homestead outside of Austin, Texas with our four children. I am a former registered nurse, and currently a homeschooling mom. Our oldest daughter is 9, and she was adopted as an infant through the foster system. At that same time, we became pregnant with our next daughter, who is now 8 years old. We continued serving as foster parents off and on for several years, and also had another daughter who is 5 years old. I just gave birth to our long-awaited baby boy three weeks ago!

Q. What kind of struggles did you face while trying to conceive?

My husband and I have always wanted many children, through both birth and adoption. It took us several years to conceive our first child, so we decided to become foster parents and pursue adoption. That has been an incredible experience for us, and we hope to return to fostering again someday. We actually found out that we were pregnant on the very same morning that we received our first foster children!

After two successful pregnancies, I began to have difficulty both getting and staying pregnant. I had very difficult and heavy periods and low energy, and I had several very early miscarriages.

Q. How did you take care of yourself emotionally and spiritually during your struggles?

My fertility issues were not nearly as difficult as the struggles some women have experienced. I had three beautiful daughters and really wanted to just appreciate and enjoy them without needing more. However, I hoped and prayed that our family could continue to grow, and especially that my daughters would have a chance to share in the miracle of new life with us some day. We continued to pray for more children! 

Bethany and I at Disneyland in 2001 or 2002

Q. Tell us a little about your decision to use Natural Family Planning and see a Catholic NFP doctor.

I have been using Natural Family Planning to monitor my cycles, time my most-fertile days, and increase the possibility of pregnancy for our entire marriage. Several years ago, my husband and I joined the Catholic Church, and found even more meaning and beauty in the ability to work together to understand our fertility. I found a Catholic OB/GYN who uses a combination of NFP charting and hormone supplementation to improve fertility and support pregnancy. He was able to use my charting to order blood tests on specific days of my cycle and pinpoint exactly which hormone deficiencies were causing my inability to maintain a pregnancy. I began hormone injections to mimic pregnancy in my body and naturally increase my levels of estrogen and progesterone.

Q. You ultimately achieved your pregnancy after stopping hormones and using herbs. What led you to that decision and how did you go about doing your research?

After several months of using the hormone replacement without much success, I decided that I had not explored any of the more natural, herbal, or dietary ways that I might be able to increase my hormone levels. I searched for ways to naturally increase progesterone levels, and found that a diet rich in dark, leafy greens, low in dairy, and high in vitamins B6 and Magnesium have been shown to help. Additionally, the spice turmeric (which can also be taken in capsule form) has been proven to naturally increase progesterone production. The herb Vitex – also called Chaste Tree Berry – has also been shown to improve fertility and reduce early miscarriages.

I decided to take a break from the hormone injections, and spend some time trying to improve my health and hormone levels with these herbs and a more healthy diet. In less than two months, I was pregnant! I returned to my NFP doctor and he found that my body still was not making as much progesterone as it should. In order to prevent miscarriage, I began taking prescription-strength progesterone pills. Every month, I had lab tests to see if my body was making more progesterone, however I ended up needing to stay on the prescription for almost the entire pregnancy. It ended up being such a simple way to support my body, and I was so thankful for having a healthy pregnancy.

Q. What advice would you give someone who is struggling with secondary infertility?

My advice for women experiencing infertility is to pray faithfully, and to seek the support of someone who understands your specific needs and desires. I really wanted to use the least invasive treatments and medications possible, and I am so thankful that my doctor supported me. You are always free to take a break from treatments and spend time researching, praying, or trying something else.

Q. Anything else you’d like to share with my readers?

Whenever I struggle with the discomforts of a pregnancy, or the difficulties of parenting a stubborn child, I try to remind myself to offer those moments as a prayer for everyone hoping and praying for children of their own. Let’s remember to pray for each other, in whatever season of parenting we may be!

Many thanks to Bethany for sharing her story with us! Please leave her a comment below to let her know you appreciate her! And as always, make sure you talk to your doctor before trying any sort of herbs or supplements!

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