Around this time every year, people start thinking about the new year and the New Year’s resolutions they want to implement. One of the most common resolutions is to start investing financially.
But how often do we think about emotional investments?
If we walk through infertility without taking measures to invest in our emotional health, we risk ending up emotionally bankrupt. We must be intentional about filling ourselves up with things that will give us hope. And not just hope for a baby, but hope that things will be okay no matter what infertility (and the rest of our life) will bring.
So how do we invest emotionally?
Start with Scripture
Scripture should always be the first thing we turn to. Not blogs. Not social media. Definitely not Google! Go to Scripture first. It is the foundation for all other investments (1 Corinthians 3:11). The central message of the Bible is hope in Christ (1 Peter 1:3-7). Unless we have hope in Christ’s salvation, all other types of hope are meaningless.
Once we have established our hope in the Gospel, we can then look to God for hope for our desires. Jeremiah 29:11 tells us that God’s plans for us are good. He knows how hard it is to wait and long for something (Proverbs 13:12). Even if we don’t understand why he’s making us wait, or why He doesn’t seem to be fulfilling a desire of our heart, we can trust that He knows what will truly satisfy us.
Pastor and author Timothy Keller recently shared this quote on his Facebook page: “God always gives us what we would have asked for if we knew everything he knows.”
If you’re not sure how to begin immersing yourself in Scripture, I highly recommend Lara Casey’s Write the Word Journals. Each journal centers around a selected theme (Cultivating Hope is my favorite), and the pages feature specially selected Scripture for you to write out, along with space to record your thoughts, prayers, or whatever is on your heart.
Read encouraging books & blogs
Those of you who grew up in the church in the 80s might remember the kids’ song that went, “Input, output, what goes in is what comes out.” The Bible says that what we choose to expose ourselves to greatly influences our mind and our heart. So we need to choose to regularly read encouraging blogs and books, and listen to positive music. I’ll be honest with you: this one is really hard for me. I love sad songs! I don’t particularly like a lot of the mainstream Christian music right now. And I enjoy a snarky blog post just as much as anyone else. We don’t need to remove those things entirely from our lives, but we do need to be intentional about making sure we fill our minds with Truth and media that will fill us up and encourage us.
I sincerely hope this blog is a source of encouragement for you. But I also don’t post as often as I’d like, and you might need encouragement on a more regular basis. Many of my infertility sisters have wonderful blogs that you should definitely check out in between my posts! Caroline, Elisha, Chelsea, Nikol, Betsy, and Meredith, just to name a few. It’s harder to recommend Christian music because everyone has their own taste. A search on Pandora or Spotify might turn up some new artists for you. I really like the Coffeehouse Chill and Indie Worship stations on Spotify. As for books, I have a list of my favorites on my Resources page.
Surround yourself with people who will point you towards Truth.
Just as we need to fill ourselves up with positive and encouraging media, we also need to surround ourselves with people who will encourage us, love us, and remind us of God’s goodness. It’s important to have friends who believe differently than us, but we need to make sure we have solid, close relationships with people who share our hope in Christ. They are the ones who can point us to Scripture, pray with us, and remind us of our Ultimate Hope. If you don’t have these types of people in your life- make it a point to find them. Most churches have small groups that meet regularly to pray, socialize, and discuss Scripture. Consistent participation in community will lead to deep friendships. Yes, it might be hard because someone in the group will likely get pregnant or be pregnant. Believe me, I understand how painful that is. But it’s worth it to try to make it work, if you can. If this is something you struggle with, pray and ask God to help you find community.
Hope is the Best Investment
So let’s think about our goals and resolutions for 2017, but let’s be sure to prioritize investing in hope. No matter what happens with our other plans, putting our hope in the One who never fails is the best thing we can do.
How are you investing in hope? Feel free to comment below.
If you’re looking for more encouragement during infertility, be sure to check out my book, 31 Days of Prayer During Infertility.
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